Dive bars generally aren’t the best smelling of places. Stale beer, sweat, and (often) despair linger in the air, but the beers are cheap and the company is largely non-judgmental.
If you just can’t get enough of that scent, though, Miller High Life is rolling out a cologne that will let you proudly wear it around town. Miller High Life Dive Bar-Fume will go on sale tomorrow. A bottle will run you $40 (which would buy a lot of beer at most dive bars).
So what, exactly, does this perfume smell like? While we haven’t gotten a whiff ourselves, Miller says it “captures every familiar dive bar scent from the satisfying crack of a freshly opened beer to the comforting savory taste of classic bar snacks.”
To achieve that, the maker of the fragrance blended a variety of scents. Cedarwood and patchouli are included to bring the smell of the bartop to mind. Tobacco and leather are blended in to recreate the barstool smell. (Please tell us you’re not sniffing the barstool at a dive bar. That would be a bad, BAD idea.)
Champaca blossom is included to recreate the smell of a Miller High Life opening (an odd choice, since flowers are not what comes to mind when most beers are popped). And sea salt, meant to bring the smell of a basket of fries, are the final blend.
Not included, apparently, is the smell of that guy at the end of the bar who’s always there, regardless of when you visit.
As with many brands, Miller High Life has lots of merchandise for its loyal customers. Other offerings, which were previously on sale, include a holiday stocking (for $48), hoodies, t-shirts, and beanies. And, for $48, you can get a High Life Belt Buckle.